


Birth of a Mons-

by Widow_Spyder



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-04 20:17:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18819949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Widow_Spyder/pseuds/Widow_Spyder
Summary: It's John's birthday and Des intends to make the most of it.





	Birth of a Mons-

John woke up way too early in his opinion. The sun was just peaking through the shades of the windows, barely even signaling that it was past 6:30 in the morning. And yet there he was, now wide awake and bored, listening to Des’s breathing behind him. 

In and out. 

In and out.

A steady pattern, indicating he was still fast asleep. Pity that John couldn’t join him. 

Instead, he got up, slowly and carefully, as to not wake Des in the process and walked to their balcony. 

From there he leaned against the railing and lit a cigarette. 

The air was crisp but not too overwhelmingly cold to be uncomfortable. He was wearing sweatpants and a shirt to combat the cool air anyway. 

It didn’t look like a lot of people were on the street yet due to the ridiculous time he found himself awake in. Not that he was concerned with joining them, mind you. 

John had been dreading this day. Or more accurately, this week in general. He hated when this time of year came around. A not so subtle reminder of what he’d done all those years ago. 

_The Anniversary…_

To be perfectly honest, John was surprised he’d made it this far. 

He was in his late 30s now; not exactly old but pretty close to being what he considered it to be. It was a miracle on its own that he’d made it this far anyway. 

As a teen, he never expected to make it past his 20s. Whether his own self deprecating thoughts or a demon on a mission got to him; he certainly wasn’t expecting to make it to his late 20s, much less his 30s. 

Sure his body moved slower than it did before and maybe his spells weren’t as strong, or he’d get drained faster from using them. That doesn’t make him old. It’s just a lifetime of chain-smoking, alcohol drinking and dark magic catching up to him, is all. 

When the day eventually did roll in, it would take all of John’s mental fortitude -- or what was left of it -- not to waste himself on the spot. 

He hated today with a burning passion. 

May 10th, 19-

No No No. 

Today is May 10th, _2019._

_Damn,_ John thought. 

It was like his mind was Pandora's box, and the date was the key to opening it, unleashing dozens of unwanted memories into the open. 

He took the last drag of his cigarette and smashed it into the ashtray. 

Today….. Today was her anniversary. 

The anniversary of _her_ death. 

The anniversary of the day he should’ve died. 

His father used to say it every single time. 

_“You should’ve died today.”_

Followed by a rough beating and then hiding under his bed for the rest of the day. 

John hadn’t realized how much time had passed until warm arms circled around his waist. 

“Good morning.” Des hummed into John’s shoulder. 

“Morning, luv.” 

“What’re you doing up this early?”

“Waiting for you to get up.” John turned in Des’s arms to face him. 

Plastering on a smile, John wrapped his arms around Des’s neck and planted a good morning kiss on Des’s lips. 

In John’s opinion, he thought he was pretty good at fooling people. 

In Des’s opinion, John could fool just about anyone, except him. 

“No seriously Johnny, why are you up this early?”   
John’s smile faltered. Of course, Des could see right through him. He just had that ability for some reason. 

He sighed, dropping his arms to his sides. 

What was he going to tell him? That today is the anniversary of the day he killed his own mother? Des knew that already, he just didn’t know what day. 

Should he tell him that today is the day? That he doesn’t plan to do anything except sulk in his own misery and memories with whiskey to swallow it down. 

Soft hands cupped his chin and John was forced to look into those eyes. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” Des asked, all soft and gentle about it. Shit, could he just melt into his arms right now? 

John took hold of the hand holding his face and squeezed it. 

“Today is my --” He took a deep breath. “Today is my birthday.” He mumbled. 

“Oh.” 

Silence. Then a bone-crushing hug. 

“I’m sorry,” Des whispered. 

“ ‘s alright.” John shrugged.

But it wasn’t, and they both knew that. 

“Come on.” 

Des took John’s hand and led him back into the apartment where he sat John down on the couch and disappeared into the bedroom. 

John sat in confusion and silence. Just what was Des planning?

He didn’t need to wonder for long because Des returned a couple minutes later, holding every pillow and blanket that he could carry and dumped all of it on top of John. Then he ran to the kitchen, leaving John to wrestle himself out of the pile of blankets. 

He could hear the unmistakable sound of the toaster popping up and the smell of sweet food coming from the kitchen.   
10 minutes later, Des pops out of the kitchen, plates in hand and helps settle the both of them on the couch with the dishes in their laps and a movie inserted into their Tv. 

Just as the opening credits of John’s favorite monster movie started playing, Des took out his phone and texted someone. 

Still perplexed and thoroughly puzzled, John leaned over and caught a sneak peek of the text before Des shoved a piece of waffle into John’s open mouth. 

_\- don’t care. I have to take care of something. Everyone knows their jobs and don’t need their boss to babysit them every day, especially when he has a family emergency. Run things, as usual, I’ll be back next week._

“Des?” 

“Nothing too big. Just a lazy day in, with my boyfriend.”

John pushed himself up a bit, shaking his head. “Des, you-”

“Want to do this.” Des finished. “Now sit down, eat your waffles and watch the movie.” he smiled, that damn smile. 

And sit down he did, making himself comfy, half on top of Des as he nibbled his waffles and watched the movie. 

It was around the second movie that he must’ve fallen asleep because the next thing he knew he was gasping for air and shaking in Des’s arms. The remnants of his dream still playing over and over in his mind. 

_“This is all your fault, killer.”_

_“You will never deserve happiness.”_

“Johnny, it’s ok, shh.” Des comforted. Somehow he was in front of him instead of behind him. 

“Hey, look at me, you’re ok.” 

Hands encircled his face and held him close, and finally, his breathing started to slow. 

John slumped into the couch, feeling more tired than ever. Des followed him, planting his head into John’s neck and wrapping his arms around John’s chest. 

“Feel better?” Des asked.

John could feel tears well up in his eyes. There was an uncomfortable itch that he couldn’t shake as long as Des’s arms were around him. It was too comfortable and domestic. Something, John knew he couldn’t get without a horrible price to pay. 

“No” John croaked. 

Those arms tightened, and John couldn’t breathe. His nerves burned for escape, to save Des and himself. But he couldn’t; he was frozen to the spot, the only sound of his discomfort being his heavy breathing. 

“I don’t deserve this.” 

“This?” 

“Comfort.” John closed his eyes. “You.”

Des got up at that. John wouldn’t admit that he felt a tinge of disappointment. But Des wasn’t leaving, just getting up to look at John. 

“I shouldn’t be here.” John continued.

Des sighed and lifted John into a sitting position. “Well... I’m glad you’re here. And I really hope you stay.” 

“Why?” John whimpered. 

“Because I love you.” Des smiled. “And nothing will change that.”

No going back now. 

John surged forward and wrapped himself around Des and held on for dear life. 

Des returned the favor and leaned back so that John was on top of him, still holding on. 

“I love you too.” John sniffed. 

Des laughed a little. “I made lunch by the way.” 

“Did you?”

“You're favorite too.” Des shifted under him. “Should I go get it?”

John hesitated. “Sure.” 

With reluctance, John let Des go, where he went into the kitchen and brought back the food a few minutes later. 

John smiled. 

From then they ate lunch and went back to watching movies. A few of John’s favorites and a few of Des’s favorites, to keep it even. 

Once the sun started to set, they decided to skip dinner. Rather eating ice cream before deciding on the final movie of the night. 

Laying in Des’s arms as the pictures on the Tv moved along, with a stomach full of good food and the comfortable warmth of the blankets, John felt himself slipping into sleep again. 

This time, without the fear of bad dreams. 

Because today was _his_ birthday. And it was a good day.

**Author's Note:**

> YES I REALIZE JOHN CONSTANTINE'S BIRTHDAY WAS 3 DAYS AGO!! DO I CARE THAT I'M 3 DAYS LATE? NOPE!
> 
> Hell, I'm surprised I was even able to write this with all my school's final projects I have to do. (Which may or may not explain why this is so short)
> 
> Wow can you believe how unproductive I've been in terms of writing fics? I promise once the month ends and summer begins that will change. 
> 
> Speaking of, Legends of Tomorrow season 4 is ending soon and I'm so sad because that means we'll have to wait a while for the next season and if John and Des don't appear at least once, I'm gonna be pissed. 
> 
> ALSO SCREW THAT DES AND JOHN ENDING 
> 
> Anyway -- Thanks for reading/making it this far and I hope you enjoyed it! :)


End file.
